Applying Grace in your Home and Marriage
We received the following three emails in succession on Oct. 3, so our answer will come after the third e-mail. We included the timestamp of each email for clarity.
Hi Sean and Lisa,
1. (Oct. 3, 2012 – 7:52am)
I have just subscribed to your newsletter and I went through your site and I see you know quite a lot on grace and I was wondering if you guys can teach me how to apply it to my life. I for some reason have a block in my mind as far as grace is concerned. I know I have been saved by grace so nothing I do can get me into heaven except my faith in Jesus and what Jesus did on the cross for me. But I’m on a mission to keep satan out of my life and so I’m trying to live as holy as possible so that my life on earth here will be easier and so every time my son is disobedient I get angry because I don’t want satan in my life or his life…or every time my husband looks at another woman I get angry because I do not want a door open to satan in my life…but this anger is making me miserable and so I feel like I’m misunderstanding something about grace….I want the love of Jesus to dominate me and flow through me but I do not know how to show the love of Jesus when my husband looks at another woman over and over again or when my son is disobedient in the same thing over and over again and so I feel as if God hates me. I know I’m wrong about God hating me so I’m trying to renew my mind about grace coz I think this might be the problem….
2. (Oct. 3, 2012 – 8:52am)
I was trying to listen to your teaching on Grace and I just can’t and I’ve just realized why because Grace is something I really need to learn and so I need to take it slow, step by step and with the teachings, there is just too much info too quickly. So I rewind and play and rewind and play and then I try and understand how to apply this to a certain situation and then I get confused and that’s where I stop lol.
Do you maybe have a way you can teach me about grace slowly, step by step and where you will be able to answer the questions in my head that pop up along the way? I really need to dissect Grace together with someone who understands grace. I think my misunderstanding about grace is the root to my spiritual frustration so I’m really keen to spend as much time as is needed to understand this grace thing and how to apply it to my life.
3. (Oct. 3, 2012 – 9:46am)
Ok I’ve just been thinking, as always, I’m always thinking…
Um what would really help me is the following:
If I write to you guys and then you guys teach me and correct me and guide me on how grace fits in with that.
For example I will send you emails like this one below and then you guys must feel free to correct me and teach me where I went wrong and how grace would have handled it:
I got upset because of the following and don’t want to get upset but I feel I will be going against the word of God if I don’t get upset.
Yesterday my son didn’t make his bed and have breakfast first so that upset me, it did not upset me because he didn’t make his bed and didn’t want eat, it upset me because of the following reasons:
1) It upset because I think he is neglecting his responsibilities in order to play a game
2) This game is a game I do not like. It’s a game for older children. My son is only 10. It’s a fighting, killing, war game called modern warfare.
Something my husband use to play a few months ago. So it upsets me that my son is neglecting his duties to play something I feel is not
good for him but I let him because it is holidays and I feel sorry for him as there is not much to do here where we live. But because I allow him
to play it, then I at least expect him to attend to his responsibilities first and if he doesn’t I get upset. Is this wrong? Does this approach go
3) I want my son to learn what grace is through my example…so I feel bad when I get upset because I want him to do what he wants to do so
that I’m a loving mother but when I let him do what he wants to do then I feel like a bad mother! Eish, I’m really confused!!!
4) He wants to play this game so badly that he even lied the other day and said I’m fasting today. In the meantime he was lying so that he didn’t
have to go eat so that he had more time to go play the game. lol…
5) Then I have this scripture in my head…if u r faithful in little will make u faithful in much… and my son always wants to do adult things and so I
got upset also because I have told him many times that he must learn to do his small responsibilities first before I can allow him to do bigger
ones and so I get upset because I want him to be happy but I can’t get myself to allow him to do bigger things if he does do the small things.
6) I get upset also because I feel that I should not have to tell him so often to make his bed, it should be something natural to him but it’s not
because he finds other things more important.
7) And then I get upset with myself because I’m not being a loving Christian so I walk around depressed with myself lol because I think I went
against grace or something
So this is how it’s been going for years now and I have had enough with my lack of knowledge which is keeping me trapped lol.
Cathy (Name changed for privacy)
(Oct. 4, 2012 – 10:46pm)
Hi Cathy (Name changed for privacy),
Here are some things to think about. Even though we believe in Jesus and are God's children and are under grace, we still do get upset. God knows that about us and He knew it when He chose us and chose us anyway. Things still happen that can upset us, but the learning experience is learning how to respond God's way, not that we don't respond at all.
Grace is NOT allowing everything to continue in our lives because God accepts us as we are and any type of effort on our part is automatically WORKS. Something is only works when we are trusting in what we are doing, whatever that may be, to place us in right standing with God. Or that we are trusting in what we are doing to bring the CHANGE or deliverance that is necessary in our lives. The test is, "What are we looking to?" Are we believing, "I'm going to stop watching TV and thus I'm going to become more holy." That is works.
However, we may decide, "Who wants TV! I want to spend time with Jesus because I love Him and want Him more!" That's faith and the by-product is that my life is never going to be the same! Any problem with any sin, lust or an unbalanced desire for anything is only because we do not truly want Jesus more than something else. Trying to stop the sin or lust isn't going to make us want Jesus more and usually only produces frustration and giving up. But believing Jesus to have more of a hunger for Him and responding to His drawing is the key. They key is, "Is this producing life or frustration?"
Many people are striving in the Christian life, trying to produce the promises of God. Striving often masquerades as aggressive faith. The fruit is that there is no rest, only desperation. It usually sounds like this, "I'm believing God for my healing! Yes, Jesus! I RECEIVE! I RECEIVE!" Usually followed by praying loudly in tongues. But there is a kernel of doubt, thus a kernel of fear. Thoughts invade our minds, "I wonder if it is going to work this time or am I going to be disappointed once again?" Thus the desperation in our "faith" where we are trying to convince ourselves and even convince God, "I believe! I believe! I believe!" We didn't do that when we received Jesus when we believed on Him. There was no striving, only rest while receiving.
In the area of allowing God's grace, which is His ability, to work in any area in our lives, we must receive His grace in that area of our life. God doesn't do things automatically without us yielding to His love, otherwise, we’d all be just like Jesus in everything we do, think and feel 100% of the time. That is why Romans 5:17 is so powerful. It says, "For if by the one man’s offense death reigned through the one, much more those who receive abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ."
We have to receive His grace, His ability, His power into our lives. When we do, we begin to open the gift of righteousness which produces reigning in life through Jesus, and also Jesus reigning through us. (Gal. 2:20) What I mean by opening the gift of righteousness, is not that we aren’t made righteous when we believe (2 Cor. 5:17, Eph. 4:24), but I’m talking about the effects of that inward reality being absolutely evident in our outward experience. That can only happen by God’s unearned ability working through our lives. We cannot produce it; it took Jesus dying for us and rising for us in order for us to be able to see it produced in our lives. When the abundance of God’s unearned grace (power, ability) is truly received, it affects our lives in every area, our lifestyle, our habits, etc. If it is God’s unearned ability, when received, that produces an outworking of righteousness and reigning in life, then there is no excuse that we can come up with to stay the same. Thus we must be honest with ourselves, if we are not reigning in life in a certain area (i.e. lust, greed, anger, etc.). Not condemning ourselves, but honest with ourselves that our lives don’t have to be like this, that they can be what God intends.
However, for too many, grace becomes an excuse to stay the same. But grace is His ability that produces His life and it comes on an unearned basis. If it is His ability that makes us become what He says we are, and that ability or power is not contingent upon our earning it, but it is only contingent upon us receiving His grace, then there is no excuse for us staying the same. We have to ask ourselves, “Why am I struggling with this? Why is this issue in my heart? This isn’t Jesus. God isn’t the source of this, so why is this a part of my life (lust, anger, fear, etc.)?”
That is where confession is powerful. Many people have a distorted understanding of 1 John 1:9, which says,“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” Many have misinterpreted this verse to frustration by saying that if we have one unconfessed sin in our lives, we will go to hell. So the whole focus is trying to remember how messed up we are and forgetting how great Jesus is. This leads to frustration and/or pride by making sure that we have confessed every sin that we may have committed, thus becoming the keeper of our own salvation. Many people have stated that that type of practice is works, and rightly so. However, some “Grace” people have stated that under grace, we do not need to confess our sins because Jesus has perfected us forever by His one sacrifice. (Heb. 10:14) They then manipulate scriptures trying to explain why this is not for us (John was talking to Jews, the unconverted, etc.) and toss this great promise out, thus in the long-run, they end up hurting themselves.
True New Testament confession of sin, or confession of anything that is lacking, is only agreeing with God, that something in our lives is not what He wants for us. That it is hurting us and hindering us. When we confess something as sin according to the New Covenant or according to grace, we are not doubting our salvation or trying to secure our salvation. Our salvation is sealed by what Jesus did on the cross. When we believe in Jesus, that He paid for our sins, we are sealed by and with the Holy Spirit. (Eph. 1:13; 4:30)
When we confess something as sin, we are receiving the abundance of grace into that area and we are thus inviting and allowing God to change us in that area. Think about it, if we are struggling with sin (lust, fear, anger, etc.), we haven’t received God’s overcoming ability in that area. In that area, we are walking according to our own strength, wisdom and understanding, even if we are trying to resist it with our own power. We are carnal in that area, thus we fail. The issue is not, “Where are you failing?” But, “Are you willing to acknowledge where you are failing as sin and rely on God’s grace to overcome?”
The true test comes when we aren’t truly convinced that something is sin. Sin even tells us, “It isn’t a big deal!” (Heb. 3:13) We may even like it in the flesh. (James 1:14) But if we love God, as we say we do, there will come a time when we will have to make a choice of what we love more and want more. It isn’t an issue of stopping something. You can stop something and still be lost. It is an issue of, “Who or what do I want more?” Sometimes the answer to that question isn’t desirable, so we skirt around the issue. But until we want Jesus more, our lives will be hit and miss so to speak. But when we’ve had enough, we are then able to agree with God and say, “That is sin. God I want you more. Send your grace, send your cleansing.” Thus, we are then able to receive the abundance of grace and are able to open the gift of righteousness because we want HIM more. Where sin abounds, grace abounds much more. So where there is sin (falling short of God’s glory), we need to receive abounding grace in that area. It doesn’t happen automatically, we have to want it more.
Everything I’ve said, I’m sure you can see where to apply it.
In the case of your husband, it hurts, but it hurts God more. It is hard not to get mad, but the truth is, until your husband wants God more than looking, you getting mad won’t produce long-term results. Every time you catch your husband, instead of getting mad because you’re understandably hurt, pray inside yourself that God will draw your husband and show your husband that God has more for him and that he would want God more than even yourself. Pray for your husband, if you don’t already, not about what he does wrong, but that your husband would love God more than anything, not so he would stop looking, but because that is your true desire for your husband. Nothing selfish. Understand what I mean by that. You aren’t praying for him to want God more because you want him to stop looking but that you want him to want God more, period/full stop. The reason he looks, is because he doesn’t want God more yet. I don’t know if your husband will see this, but this isn’t an attack on him. A lot of men do what your husband is doing and most don’t think it’s a big deal. But this is the way to freedom in any area.
In the case with your son, we presume that your son already knows his responsibilities. If he neglects them, then you should proceed to discipline him.
He may get upset, because you are disciplining him. That's all right! He'll get over it. However, how you discipline him is the key. Remember in James 1:19-20 says, "So then my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God." When we're angry and responding in frustration, that won't produce the righteousness of God.
However, lack of godly discipline towards our children is actually a lack of grace. Remember Paul, the apostle of grace, said in Ephesians 6:1-4, "1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” 4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”
Definitions of exasperate are: to cause great irritation or anger to; infuriate; to worsen; aggravate.
My experience is that discipline works when you explain what was done wrong, why it is wrong, and what is expected. Anger and raised voices are not necessary. However, consequences for breaking rules or not doing what is expected can be laid out ahead of time and then enforcement of such consequences need to carried out.
Both you and your husband need to be in agreement. When your son sees that you both are together on this, and you both support each other and enforce each other’s discipline, it will help. Both you and your husband should agree on what type of games he should be allowed to play, how much time he may allot to it each day, the time when he may play, etc. It may be a good form of discipline that if he doesn’t do his chores (making bed, etc.) that he loses his privilege of playing the game for that day. If your husband doesn’t feel that a game is good for your son to play, he may consider what example is being set if he plays such a game. However, that is up to you and your husband to decide.
When I ran restaurants, I made checklists that specified the tasks for each day and each shift. I didn’t expect my workers to know and remember what to do, even though I could have. It just made it easier on all of us to know what was expected in writing and each shift the workers looked at the checklist and did what was on it. When the shift was almost over, I looked at the checklist to see if the tasks were done. If something wasn’t done, I politely asked, “Why?” And then made sure that it was completed.
You may consider making a checklist that hangs on your son’s door. Each morning he needs to take the checklist and do the tasks for each day. Everyday, making the bed will be the same, but other days it may include taking out the trash, etc. This should be completed before any privilege is considered. You will need to check the tasks and make sure they are complete. Remember, most people do what is inspected, not what’s expected. Your son is young and not mature as yet. It may be hard, but don’t react as if he is a terrible kid because he forgot or doesn’t want to do what you expect him to do. You are training him. Training is always difficult, but once trained, it is easier.
However, in any rate, you and your husband must be consistent with the discipline. It doesn’t have to be anger related at all. Actually, your son will appreciate, after a while, once he knows that this is the way it is and that mom and dad are in this together and that they don’t yell and get mad, but make sure it is done and that I lose my privileges when I’m showing an attitude or lie, etc. He’ll actually get used to it and you’ll see a difference in his attitude.
This is long enough, but quickly, you mentioned not wanting to open the door and live holy, etc. Again, my aforementioned comments dealt with that as well. The devil cannot operate in our lives any differently than God does. What I mean by that is that God doesn’t change us instantly in every area because we aren’t fully agreeing with Him in all areas and likewise the devil cannot destroy us instantly because we aren’t fully agreeing with him in all areas as well.
Remember, Jesus taught this concerning the Kingdom of God. In Mark 4:26-29 it says, “26 And He said, “The kingdom of God is as if a man should scatter seed on the ground, 27 and should sleep by night and rise by day, and the seed should sprout and grow, he himself does not know how. 28 For the earth yields crops by itself: first the blade, then the head, after that the full grain in the head. 29 But when the grain ripens, immediately he puts in the sickle, because the harvest has come.”
The devil must operate in the same exact fashion even with unbelievers. That is the way God created things to work. The devil has to scatter his seed (deceptions) on the ground (our hearts and minds). And the harvest grows in stages. It takes time for the devil to work his plans in our lives as well. He can’t just come in and plant one seed and destroy us. God’s results aren’t seed time and harvest and the devil’s results are instantaneous.
Now, of course, I am not saying that we ignore the lies and deceptions (satan’s seeds) that we are allowing in our homes. But I am saying that we don’t have to fear, “Oh, no! We watched something that had some garbage! Now the devil has full and free access! We’re doomed!” So we get into bondage and fear and we can become aggravated and harsh towards those around us.
Again, it goes back to what do we want more. Seeds don’t produce instantaneously. So, yes, we do need to watch what is being sown into our hearts. But satan isn’t stronger than God and and he cannot work faster than God. I hope you understand my point. We don’t need to be fearful.
Sean and Lisa
(Oct. 8, 2012 – 2:44pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
WOW this has helped us more than I expected!!!!!!!!!!
I have been doing all that you have mentioned for years but you have shown me that I have been doing it wrong in the wrong way and you have shown me how to correct it. Thank you so much. I didn’t know that grace meant Gods power and ability! WOW that is a huge revelation and its makes so much more sense now!!!!!! THANK YOU VERY MUCH for sharing this email!!!! I feel much better now that I know what I’m doing wrong!!!
Have to run, Baby is awake.
What is the Difference between Grace and Mercy
(Oct. 22, 2012 – 3:53pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
Hi Guys I was wondering if you could maybe explain to me what God's Mercy is…
(Oct. 24, 2012 – 6:05pm)
This is a question that many ask. I actually deal with it in my Power of Grace series.
Briefly, mercy is when God DOES NOT GIVE US what we deserve. Grace is when God GIVES US what we DO NOT deserve. In other words, we deserve to go to hell, but in Christ, God DOES NOT GIVE US what we deserve. That is His mercy. In Christ, God GIVES US eternal life even though we DO NOT deserve it. That is His grace.
Hebrews 4:15-16 "15 For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need."
When we look at verse 16 in light of verse 15, we see that it is speaking of temptation. So when we are feeling tempted, or even if we fall into the temptation, the tendency is to feel guilty and run away from the Lord because of our guilt. This is teaching us that in the midst of temptation, do not try and handle it on your own with your own strength and reasoning, but run to His throne of grace with boldness, not with fear. Because it is His grace that is the power to overcome anything.
We are coming to His throne of GRACE, which is His UNDESERVED ability and power. When we do that, we receive His mercy and His grace in our time of need in the midst of our temptation. Grace and mercy can never be earned; we can never be good enough for it. Even if we are living saintly, we are still not good enough to receive God's grace and mercy. Even if we are living satanly, we will never be too bad to disqualify ourselves from God's DESIRE to offer us His grace and mercy. As soon as we think that we deserve God's grace, we just disqualified ourselves from being able to receive God's grace.
When we are tempted, especially when we give in or are on the threshold of giving in, we may certainly FEEL that we deserve God's wrath and punishment. The thought process usually is, "How can I call myself a Christian and be tempted by this or give in to this? God must certainly be shocked and angry with me. I deserve His punishment and do not deserve for Him to help me."
So these scriptures are mind-renewing scriptures. God doesn't want to give us what we deserve, His rejection and wrath. That is His mercy. But He wants to give us what we do not deserve, His ability, power and forgiveness. That is His grace.
So again, verse 16 says, "16 Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need."
To paraphrase we could say, "When you are tempted or giving in to sin, don't run away in fear and disgust. Instead run to God, because He sits on a throne that does not want to give us what we deserve, but goes even further and then gives us what we do not deserve in the midst of temptation or even our failure, which is the exact time that we need God's help."
We must be absolutely persuaded of this one truth. We DID NOT deserve God's grace, we DO NOT deserve God's grace and we WILL NEVER deserve God's grace, but God is offering grace (His favour, power and ability) to us anyway. The same goes for mercy.
Sean and Lisa
Tapping into Truth, Grace and Love to Help Your Marriage
(Oct. 24, 2012 – 11:48am)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
May I ask you another question?
In the light of Grace, how does one overcome the fear of people?
I have never been scared of people before but I’ve been through some stuff in my marriage over the last 10 years that I’m struggling to get over. I have prayed. I have stepped out in Faith and quoted scriptures etc.…
Now that I understand grace better I’m starting to read the word differently so maybe that will help.
I’m just so tired of being scared of people. It’s not good especially as a Christian and its definitely, not who I was before I got married or who I still am very deeeeeeeeeeeeeeep down inside. I was exactly the opposite…do you have any advice on how to unstrap myself through using Gods Grace, how does one do it?
God Bless and thank you,
(Oct. 24, 2012 – 3:40pm) - Additional Information prior to answer
Dear Sean and Lisa,
I think I worded my previous email incorrectly, I don’t have a fear of people I love people but I have a fear of my husband because he will do whatever it takes to get people to like him, especially if he can gain something from them even if it’s just attention.
Eg: He will treat me like a peace of rubbish and them like queens just so that they will like him.
This has happened over and over again and women love it. As a result the women treat me like rubbish because they now think they are better than me because my husband treats them better. He takes it even further by supporting them when they start treating me like rubbish and as a result we have no friends or family around us because he has even done this with his family.
Please bear in mind that He is 33 and I am 34 so this is real child play for me. I have no time for this type of stuff and I’m living a life I don’t want to live and I have no interest in changing him neither coz I want him to be happy and to be who he chooses to be. But if that means emotionally abusing me, then I would rather get a divorce and raise my children with Godly morals and standards, but divorce also does not seem right. This behavior has also affected our son negatively and has brought much fighting and tears, but still he carries on as if someone is holding a gun to his head and making him do it.
He never use to do this when we first met…after a few weeks of being together his friends (male) said to him that he must stop holding me coz it makes his/their beer curdle and he came home and told me that he is going to stop holding me because of what his friends said. So he did stop holding me. Many years later, he now does hold me, but for the wrong reason. And then at the same time, he will treat other women better than me, while holding me. Lol. It’s actually really hysterical. lol…(this is the behavior his friends loved and supported)
He has different personalities and he will use whatever personality is needed to get people to like him. But when we get home, he is TOTALLY different! Then he even expects to be treated with respect and honour and can’t understand why there is always stress. So I now stay indoors; I never go out so that I don’t see this happen, so that I can treat him with respect. I still submit to him even when he does this, but submission he sees and treats as weak.
His eyes even change colour literally when he is around others, everything about him changes, its actually quite scary. What bothers me the most is that because he is different by other people, I don’t know how to act and then I get scared. (My fear I’m talking about) and all these emotions start coming up and I don’t know how to deal with them and then people think I’m weird…. I have no idea what to do…and so if God’s grace is sufficient for me then how do I apply it to this coz we’re going to visit the only friends we have here this weekend and my stomach is in a knot already and its only Wednesday.
Please bear in mind that my husband did get saved a few years back and he is trying to change, but what do I do in the process of his change? This has gone on for over 10 years and the way I used to deal with it was simply forgiveness. But that seemed to give him the wrong message. For some reason he saw me as weak and desperate to be with him, and also as if forgiveness gave him permission to do it again and again and again… So I’m seriously desperate on how to deal with this in the like and understanding of Grace (Gods power and ability).
(Oct. 26, 2012 – 2:18pm)
It is difficult being able to answer not truly knowing the full details from both sides. It appears that there are more issues under the surface.
I must preface what I am going to say with the fact that I'm not attacking you or your husband nor am I taking any sides. I do not like to feel as if I'm prying into people's personal lives. I also do not think that I have it all together and I am thus, lecturing you. So understand, that I'm trying to help with the same truths that I have had to acknowledge and come to face with. Let me say that I am still in the process of acknowledging and allowing these truths to work in my life. It is a lifelong process for all of us.
To begin, I would like to quote two verses. In John 8:32, it says, "And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." However, Galatians 4:16 says, "Have I therefore become your enemy because I tell you the truth?"
Truth is rarely convenient to the natural and carnal man. Because of our corrupted human pride which we received from Adam (whether we like it or not or whether we admit it or not), even when we are devastated by our own failure, we resist the truth. We can resist the very thing that can set us free because we can not admit we need the truth. I'm a self-made man/woman, etc. I am just fine, thank you very much!! I'm not as bad as him/her!!
We can resist the very thing that can set us free because we claim that we already know the truth and we are already free even though everyone else can see that something is amiss. Many people “under grace” make great claims about who they are in the spirit but refuse and deny who they are in their actions. Thus, because they will not agree with God that they are still un-renewed, they will continue un-renewed indefinitely, until they swallow their pride and deception and say, "Something must be wrong because I do not live and respond in a way congruent with who God says He made me to be. I must not be believing the TRUTH somewhere. I must be resisting God's TRUTH from being able to work in my life."
We can resist the very thing that can set us free because we claim that we already know the truth but it doesn't work. That is extreme pride.
We can resist the very thing that can set us free because we claim that even though the truth works for others, we believe our situation is unique and thus outside of God's truth being able to set us free. That is also extreme pride.
There are two more verses that I would like to quote. In James 1:21-22, it says, "Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness, and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls, but be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves." In 1 Peter 1:23, it says, "having been born again, not of corruptible seed but incorruptible, through the word of God which lives and abides forever."
There is nothing wrong with the Word, not ever. If something isn't working in our lives, we are the problem, not God's truth. We must receive with MEEKNESS the IMPLANTED WORD, which is able to save our un-renewed souls (hearts). The heart is a combination of the spirit and soul. That is why there is often turmoil. Part of us yearns for God and another part of us can be frustrated, impatient, angry, nervous, etc.
Also, meekness means to agree with what God says and to say, "No matter what, what God says is truth!" Even if that truth seems contradictory to what we have always believed. Notice also, the word must be IMPLANTED, which indicates roots, which indicates that their will be fruit from the seed of God's word. Fruit is born from the nature of the root that is growing in our lives.
If there is turmoil, regardless of what we say, the root that is growing is not God's IMPLANTED word because the fruit reflects something else. That is where meekness comes in. We have to humble ourselves and say, "Regardless of whether I think that I planted the Word, the fruit reveals that something else is the most dominant and it is growing in the soil of my heart."
So, firstly, let me say that even though there is pain concerning this situation, divorce won't solve the pain issue. The pain will continue and most likely will get worse and will continue to replicate and increase until the issues are dealt with. So the question is, do you want to deal with the issues while married or after divorce? Either way, you'll have to deal with the issues.
Remember, problems in marriage are nothing new. However, in today's world, the solution of divorce being the answer in its current capacity is something new and that is due to self-centeredness being promoted. I'm not happy! I'm not being treated right! (see 2 Tim. 3:1-4) Although this attitude is prevalent, the consequences and results to the family unit and thus to the nations, show that that solution is not working.
Even though the temptation could be to walk away because of the hurt, the hurt doesn't walk away. We take it with us where ever we go. It won't necessarily be better "out there". So unless there are issues with infidelity, I personally would recommend staying and continuing to believe God. Even if there are issues with infidelity, you do not have to leave, you could also stay and believe God. However, Jesus did state that in cases of infidelity, people are free to divorce, but He actually didn't state that they are then free to remarry. (See Matt. 5:31-32) Remember, grace does not make that which used to be sin, no longer sin. Sin isn't just the act but also the resulting consequences. The problems resulting from divorce and remarriage are still present even under grace.
Does that mean that someone can't tap into the grace of God and be set free after divorce and/or remarriage? No, a person can absolutely tap into His Grace and be set free. However, in my humble opinion, and I believe that I am in agreement with God's word, a person who is already exposed to the truth of God's grace and the truth of His Word, why would they want to wait to tap into and apply God's grace and truth? Why not tap into God's grace and truth right now?! You are going to have to do tap into it regardless. In order to be set free, you will have to do it before divorce or after divorce. Why not before?!
However, if a person chooses to divorce, God still loves that person and will still be willing to help that person, but if you are already exposed to God's truth and grace now, why would you not be willing to believe now rather than later? If you are not willing to believe that it will work now, what makes you so sure that you will change and be willing to believe that it will work then?
Also, if you do divorce, and you do tap into God's grace and truth and are set free, that is great for you, but what about your children? There is no guarantee, that even though you were able to be healed, they will be willing to believe and tap into God's grace for they themselves in order to be healed.
Now let's get back to the issues that you are dealing with now. Even if you, personally, had no issues before marriage, which probably isn't accurate, you have them now. Marriage usually doesn't create issues in people's hearts, rather, marriage usually exposes what was already present, even if the individuals weren't aware of them.
Remember, Jesus came to seek and save that which was lost. We are all lost and a mess without Jesus. Even if people seem to have it all together and seem successful in this life, without Jesus, they are truly lost and truly a mess. Compared to Jesus, we are all an impotent mess.
So, you must realize that both you and your husband are in the same condition, a mess. I'm obviously speaking of the un-renewed mind/heart, which expresses its un-renewal in our actions, thoughts and perceptions. However, you both express that un-renewed condition in different ways.
Because of how he truly feels about himself, in his un-renewed heart, he projects that upon you. The way you truly feel about yourself, in your un-renewed heart, you react to what he does. That is why renewing the mind is a lifelong process until we go to be with Jesus. I'm sure you know that renewing the mind is coming into agreement with what Jesus has done in our spirit, but our souls are still contaminated with our upbringing, our experiences, our culture, etc.
What I mean by how a person truly feels about himself or herself, is not what they say when they are pretending to be strong and that they have it all together. I am also not talking about how us "good" Christians speak to others about how "free" we are in Christ because we learned about who we are in Christ and we know what should only be in our heart, even though it truly isn't a reality yet in our experience. Almost all humans are deceived concerning the true condition of their hearts, especially Christians.
If we aren't free in an area, then we do not KNOW the true TRUTH in that area. Jesus said in John 8:31-32, "...If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." Now, we may know what is true, but it truly hasn't become TRUTH to us, where it supersedes whatever we are facing. Notice that it states that truth doesn't make someone free or everyone would be free, because truth exists. It states that when you KNOW by revelation the TRUTH, then that TRUTH is the power and that Truth, itself, makes you free.
Revelation of the TRUTH produces that TRUTH, who is Jesus, doing the work through us. (see Galatians 2:20) Until we have revelation of the TRUTH, which is Jesus and His love and acceptance of us, we are trying to make something true, trying to do the work because we agree that something is true and should be in our lives. Therefore, because we are doing the work in our strength, trying to produce truth or the promise or trying to produce the fruit, we fail. That is why a revelation of grace is so important. Grace is Jesus living through us.
I do not know where your husband is in his true desire for Jesus living in him, the first email I wrote applies here as it would in any situation. Who do we want more, Jesus or ____________? We could insert in the blank, being loved by my husband, being accepted by people, being successful, etc.
You can not change your husband, but you can allow TRUTH to change you. If you know how much Jesus loves and accepts you, then any way your husband acts towards you in front of other people, won't devastate you. Ephesians 1:6-8 says, "to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved. In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace which He made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence..."
The Father loves you with the SAME love that He loves Jesus. The bible says in John 17:23 says, "I in them, and You in Me; that they may be perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have LOVED THEM AS You have loved Me." And Jesus loves you with the SAME love that He loves the Father. The bible says in John 15:9 says, "AS the Father loved Me, I ALSO HAVE LOVED you; abide in My love." I don't know if you have listened to the series on Inheritance that is on our website, but listen especially to the first session. You could listen to the whole series as it is a teaching on letting Jesus live through you. You should also listen to the Power of Grace series.
So we all need an absolute revelation on the love that the Father and Jesus and the Holy Spirit have for us. When we have such a revelation of God's acceptance and love of us, that we are accepted in Jesus and that He loves us to the same degree that He loves Jesus and that Jesus loves us to the same degree that He loves the Father, it will set us free. When we are secure in Jesus and not in the opinions that others have of us, not even in the opinion that we may have of ourselves, we will be truly free. Many of us are truly consumed with how others think about us, even if we say that we aren't.
You respond the way you do because of how you truly feel about yourself in your un-renewed heart. While the manner in which your husband may treat you, may not be what Jesus desires, remember, your husband is probably only treating you the way he truly feels about himself. You need to get a revelation that he probably does what he does because of how he feels about himself. He probably doesn't even know that is why he does it.
Most people who treat others in such a fashion it is usually due to their own feelings of inadequacies, insecurities, fear of rejection, etc. Almost always, it is due to how they were treated by their own parents while growing up (neglected; raised themselves; demeaned by parent(s); always made to feel inadequate; nothing was ever satisfactory, etc.) They may have also been through different types of abuse (emotional, physical, etc.). There is also the possibility, for the one doing the abusing, of possessing a feeling of superiority in some aspect, but even that is usually a mask.
However, you can actually get to the place of liberty in Jesus that you are so secure in how HE feels about you, that you are able to maintain your emotions and keep them secure in Christ. It will then be easy to recognize why your husband is doing what he is doing and instead of being wounded because you misinterpret things by actually thinking that he is lashing out at you, you can realize that he is demonstrating what is in his heart and is miserable himself. He wants others to accept him because, to me, it seems there is a root of rejection. Especially that you state that his eyes change colors. That demonstrates a spirit at work that has probably plagued him since childhood.
Remember, that Jesus wants to set you free and you being set free is not contingent upon anyone else, unless you allow it. When Jesus is dealing with you, He is dealing with you alone. He doesn't bring up anyone else as, in light of eternity, no one else truly matters. You can be free even if you were physically in prison.
You can take authority over the spirit and thank God that you will have a great time with your friends. You should prepare yourself before hand how you will respond to any possible demeaning.
You state that your husband thinks that you forgiving him is a sign of weakness, how do you know that? Has he stated that or do you think that because he keeps demeaning you in front of others and thus you have come to that conclusion because he keeps doing it? Has he apologized to you for what he does, or do you tell him that you forgive him even when he hasn't asked for it?
If he actually has told you that you forgiving him is an act of weakness, I would ask him why he doesn't believe that we need to forgive others when Jesus has forgiven us?
Anyway, I must go.
Sean and Lisa
(Oct. 26, 2012 – 4:24pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
Hi thanks for your E-Mail. Yes, I know its difficult to help others out not knowing both sides…please understand that I’m asking for help coz we’re quite desperate and also because I need to be corrected. I know it is something I’m doing wrong but I have no idea what. I’m busy going through some teachings from CBC on renewing the mind. Spirit soul and Body... which also ties in with your Email…
My husband has told me that he is treating me like that because he is taking revenge on me for what his ex did to him. His father is very evil but he loves his dad and held a grudge against me for a couple of years when I stood up for him when his dad screamed at him because of a tumble dryer.
Yes, he told me that he sees submission as weak. He also told me that he has no fear of God yet. He blames his past a lot and I used to as well, but then my brother had a dream which showed that I’m going through a tough time and so I couldn’t hide it anymore by blaming my hubby’s past.
I was hiding it from my family. But even after that dream, I managed to cover up really well (well at least I hope so coz my goal is not to make my hubby look bad, my goal is to find answers which my family don’t have). They think everything is wonderful with us.
Once my father picked up that something wasn’t right, so I told him like a tiny small part, but he knows nothing of what I’ve been going through and also don’t want anyone to know, which is why I avoid contacting him. None of my friends know neither. I’m just asking you guys because I’m seriously desperate. I’m not really struggling with hurt. I know it sounds weird but I’m not. I’m frustrated because I want to grow as a Christian but I don’t know how to use the Grace of God in this given situation in order to grow.
The reason why I’m not hurt is because I saw a vision of the spirit of lust one day and I feel it’s quite stupid getting hurt by this tiny little thing. I also don’t get jealous at all. I know that sounds weird but I do not over other women. I think jealously is pathetic. I do get jealous when I see videos of people praising and worshipping together, but I don’t feel that is a bad jealous coz its more like I’m extremely happy for them and wish I could be there too. What does hurt me is the fact that I want my husband to be happy and it doesn’t seem like he is happy when he is with me, which is also why I want to let him go because I want him to be with someone that makes him happy. He has told me that I’m not like other women. I don’t need money and materialistic things to make me happy. I don’t spend his money. I wait until he buys me something so that we don’t fight about money. I probably have less clothes than some poor people I know. I have one pair of sandals I wore in summer and one pair of tekkies. I don’t expect him to help in the house and I don’t put pressure on him to bring home a lot of money at all. I don’t complain about stupid things. I always complain about things that threaten my salvation or my son’s. I look after myself and make sure I look my best as often as possible with what I have. I do gym as well. I work very hard to keep the house clean and tidy. Our cupboards are in order and I make sure that his needs are met in all areas. I however don’t know how to help him spiritually so I simply wait for an opportunity where by I can support him spiritually and then I support 100%.
So I don’t understand why he isn’t happy with me. I have asked him what did I do that he hates me and he said I do nothing wrong and that he doesn’t hate me, he was just spoilt as a child. I don’t cook as well as he does but he has come to terms with that in the last few months and I am trying my best to improve on my cooking even though I don’t cook bad at all, he is just used to extremely good cooking. When he cooks it tastes like we’ve eaten in a restaurant. I insist that he is the man of the house but he doesn’t like being the man of the house so I complain a lot about that because my son is now taking the role of the man in the house and it’s not right. Maybe I should stop complaining about that!
You guys have mentioned a lot of things in your email that I need to go through…like the love of God…mmmm….I know God loves me but I think he loves others more but that doesn’t bother me because I know its not the truth. I think that’s my husband’s problem as well… we talk a lot which is why I know a little of how he feels… I tell him everything… Including my communication with you guys… well he has access to all my emails, so everything is always out in the open. He knows he has a problem and I know I have a problem and both just want answers.
I think this spirit soul and body thing that we going through will give me some answers as well and then I will also go through your teaching you mentioned… Inheritance series… thank you very much!!!
Just one more question : You mentioned that one can take authority over a spirit? How does one do that?
Many thanks and God Bless
(Oct. 26, 2012 – 7:30pm)
Are you guys going through CBC via correspondence? I would advise patience while growing in the Lord. It can become frustrating feeling that we should be further along. But the key is, are we further along than we were before?
Please listen to the Inheritance series. As for knowing the love of God, it goes beyond knowing that God loves us. We can never have a great enough revelation of God's love. When we truly begin to have a revelation of the love of God for us, it consumes us and Jesus becomes enough for us. Desperation melts and rest is the result.
As far as taking authority, you should probably listen to Andrew's series on The Believer's Authority and also Lisa's series on The New Covenant Believer's Position in Authority. The Inheritance series also gives some keys to authority which is allowing Jesus to live through us and to continue to fulfill His desires on the earth through us.
Briefly, we have authority over spirits in the name of Jesus. It is simply telling them to get lost and to resist them. However, James 4:7 says that we should submit to God, which is His truth and then we are able to resist the devil. It actually becomes Jesus resisting the devil through us because He is all we want.
I remember a few days after we were married, Lisa was sleeping and I was awake and thinking and the thought came to me, "Jesus is all you need." I thought, "Yes, that's true! Jesus is all I need." Then another thought came immediately and said, "But, is Jesus all you WANT?" I then knew that the Holy Spirit was speaking to me. So I lay there for a few hours thinking about how my life would be different if Jesus was truly all that I WANTED.
We readily agree that Jesus is all we need, but is He truly all we want? Some of the choices we make show us that Jesus is NOT all that we want. When we continue doing the same old things, thinking the same old way, treating people the same old way, refusing the allow the Word to change our thinking, we are declaring that Jesus is NOT all that we want.
So, both of you need to be in agreement as to what you want to do. In James 1:5-8 tells us that God is more than willing to give us what we need without finding fault, but that we need to be 100% committed and not double minded as that prevents us from receiving from the Lord. I don't know if you have seen the marriage diagram, but I drew it below.
The bottom of the triangle signifies that the husband and wife are far apart. However, as they desire Jesus more and get closer to Him, they move up the triangle and thus become closer to each other. The goal is not to be a close couple, I know that sounds crazy! The goal is to be close to Jesus and the result will be that you are close to each other as well. If you are not close as a couple, then you aren't close to Jesus. And trying to get closer as a couple does not produce getting closer to Jesus, but getting closer to Jesus will produce getting closer to each other. And getting closer to Jesus is not what we do, it is always based on a revelation of Him and His love and that will affect what we do.
The word tells us in Eph. 5:25-26 for husbands to love their wives. The reason is because it isn't natural for a man to do it. It takes Jesus living through us to truly be able to fulfill that. Thus as we get closer to Him, it is Him loving our husbands or wives through us. It isn't about what we do for each other; it's about allowing the Lord, through the overflow of the revelation of His love, to flow to our mate.
In Eph. 5:28, it tells us that he who loves his wife loves himself. If a man hates his wife or mistreats her, he is actually hating and mistreating himself. And that is due to what is going on, in his own heart. Why is it that many women say, he didn't treat me like this before we were married? Because before marriage, the two were not one flesh. But after marriage, they became one flesh.
If I respond to my wife harshly when she asks a question about something, could it be because I am insecure and the filter of how I feel about myself, that I perhaps inherited from how I was treated by my father, that filter tells me that she is attacking me, and questioning me, and thinking that I'm stupid or a loser, that she doesn't support me, even though in her mind she isn't doing anything like that?
Many times a man can feel inadequate due to various issues. If he feels he isn't accomplishing anything on this earth or feels that he isn't properly providing for his family, that can produce insecurities. If he had a childhood that enforced such mindsets of not being good enough, that can be a lot to deal with. A lot of times, a lust problem is merely the fruit of such a root system. So people try and deal with the fruit and not the root.
Actions are only the fruit, not the root of the problem. If I knock all of the avocados off of the tree because I hate avocados, I may think, "Whew! Thank God all of the avocados are gone!" But the fruit will return because I didn't lay the axe at the root. Our actions, how we respond, how we treat people or if we're unhappy with life (the fruit), those are only symptoms of the sickness (the root). The root is what most of us don't see because it is beneath the surface. Most of us see the fruit and try and knock down the fruit, so we see "success" for a while, but the fruit comes back because the root system that produced the fruit is still there.
The root system is usually deep and it can take time to see it destroyed. That is why it takes patience. It isn't that it takes God a long time, but that it takes us a long time to acknowledge the Truth and allow God to lay the axe at the root. That can happen in an instant of revelation but then we need to resist those old ways of thinking or how we see ourselves, from returning.
The devil doesn't give up. He is very cunning and will try to get us back into the old rut. He knows that we become accustomed to a way of thinking and that it becomes natural for us to think in certain ways. We cannot tolerate anything that feeds that old way of thinking if we want to be free. They only way to total freedom is absolute death on our part. Jesus died so that He could live on the inside of us, now we must die so that He can live through us.
The Christian life is not difficult it is impossible in our strength. The sooner we come to the end of ourselves, the better. Only in weakness can Jesus live through us. Jesus said to Paul in 2 Cor. 12:9 that His grace is sufficient for us and that His strength is made perfect in our weakness.
The Christian life is about being weaker and weaker in ourselves, not becoming stronger and stronger in ourselves. When we are weak in ourselves, then Jesus can be strong through us. If we try and be strong, then we make Jesus weak through us in our experience. I would advise you and your husband listen to the Power of Grace series. I think it would help.
There is no way to change over night. But do we really want to change? Do we really want Jesus?
Sean and Lisa
(Oct. 26, 2012 – 4:50pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
Holy macaroni!!! and Praise God coz once again this email is EXTREMELY enlightening! You guys have mentioned things which we have never thought of but which makes sooooooo much sense to us both! This whole email contains so many answers for us! Thank you so much for this, you have no idea how much we both appreciate this!!!!!!!
We’re not doing CBC correspondence. We so badly want to, so we’re trying to get the money together! In the mean time I just felt lead to ask someone for some notes so she sent me through some stuff that they’re doing at CBC currently. It all goes hand in hand with your emails, so we definitely going to go through the teachings you guys have recommended step by step! You guys are extremely gifted and we’re extremely blessed that u have crossed our paths!!!
Thank you and Stay blessed!
An Analogy of Grace and Faith
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 1:30pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
I’ve been listening to the power of grace...so now I’m trying to put the definition of grace into my own words.
God’s grace is like a steroid. It’s the power behind the muscles which requires little physical exercise in order to develop as most of the work gets done by the steroid. Grace does not work on its own. It needs our interaction, just like with steroids. God’s grace supports our right choices just like steroids supports muscle growth.
Would those be correct?
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 4:12pm)
I would say that is one way of looking at it. Sort of like a sail on a sailboat.
The sail is the part that is necessary to give the wind something to fill in order for the power of the wind to be able to move the boat. The sail isn't the source of power, but it harnesses the power that is present. The wind is present without the sail, but without the sail the wind won't be able to make a difference. Likewise, the sail without the wind is useless. You don't lift the sail to make the wind come. You lift the sail because the wind is blowing.
Grace would be the wind and faith would be the sail. Faith expresses itself in what we believe and in the choices we make.
Romans 5:1 - God offers us peace with him through Jesus but our faith makes that offer take effect. The offer of peace is present like the wind but doesn't do us any good until we believe or put up the sail.
Sean and Lisa
Grace, Truth and Deception
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 1:37pm)
Another question please Sean and Lisa
would deception be the opposite of Grace?
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 4:48pm)
The opposite of deception is truth. But grace and truth came through Jesus Christ - John 1:17.
If something isn't TRUTH it cannot be grace, regardless of how people spin their logic.
Many people claim to be "under grace", but what they believe or even their lifestyle isn't according to TRUTH.
Jesus said that the Word is TRUTH - John 17:17.
Sean and Lisa
The Difference between Grace and the Anointing
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 1:58pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
What is the difference between the Grace of God and the annointing of God cause they sound very similar which makes me think i am misunderstanding
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 5:33pm)
Basically, the anointing could be explained as a form of grace or outworking of grace, which is the Lord flowing through you to others.
Acts 10:38 says, "how God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and with power, who went about doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil, for God was with Him."
And also in Luke 4:18-19 it says, “The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me, Because He has anointed Me To preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives And recovery of sight to the blind, To set at liberty those who are oppressed; To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD."
The anointing is a person, the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is the power source and He flows through us to others not because we are good but because He is good. The only qualification is that we are born-again. We cannot be good enough for God to flow through us to others. It isn't based on how much we fast, pray, read the word, etc.
But when we fast with the correct understanding or heart, pray with the correct understanding, read the word with the correct understanding, we become more in tune with the Lord, not that we earn favor with the Lord. When we are more in tune with the Lord, it is easier for us to believe and thus we see more anointing flowing in our life.
When people ask, "How did you get the anointing on your life?" If you do not understand grace, you may make an incorrect correlation that it was the fasting, praying and reading the word that produced the anointing. That is when a works based mindset creeps in and gets spread to others.
Sean and Lisa
Faithfulness in Marriage and the 10 Commandments
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 2:45pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
I hope this is my last question for today:)
I was communicating with someone once about faithfulness in marriage and the ten commandments and this person replied with an answer something similar to this. I am under grace and therefore the ten commandments do not apply to me. Their point was that Jesus said to love everyone and by being nice, polite and having manors to other women they see as love, even though they were not doing it to their own spouse.
How would u have replied if you were me?
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 6:11pm)
We are not justified by keeping the 10 commandments. We are not saved by keeping the 10 commandments. But stating, that under grace the 10 commandments do not apply to us, in the context that now we can break them, because we are under grace, is a false concept. Actually, it is a very dangerous concept. (Rom. 3:20-22,28; Rom. 6:1-2,16)
What used to be wrong under the law, is still wrong under grace. However, the law only pointed out what was wrong and what was right, but it gave us no power to do what was right and not do what was wrong. We were totally on our own to try to live victoriously in our own strength.
(Rom. 8:3; Heb. 7:18-19; Acts 15:5-11; Acts 13:38-39)
Grace is God's ability in us, His love in us, etc. Therefore under grace, we receive the power to do what is right and the power to not do what is wrong. It is God living in us. Therefore, if we are committing adultery, we cannot say, "Well, I'm under grace and now it is ok!" Are you saying that God is empowering you to commit adultery? Obviously He wouldn't empower you to do such a thing. (Gal. 2:20; Gal. 5:16)
Most people who say, "Hey, I'm under grace! I'm not under the law!" and they are saying that in reference to doing something wrong, they are merely using grace as an excuse or a cover up for actually not tapping into grace. They are hiding their own failure to appropriate God's unearned power in their lives to be like Jesus. They are hiding their own failure to truly believe and want Jesus more. (Rom. 6:14)
Grace looks like Jesus. I don't see Jesus doing the things people claim are ok under their version of grace. That is why I said, if it isn't TRUTH, it cannot be grace.
A husband who is "walking" in love towards other women but isn't towards his own wife is under deception. To try and state that he isn't under the 10 commandments but under grace, and then pretend to be so concerned in obeying Jesus' command to love all the other women, is lying to himself. He more than likely has insecurity issues and a lust problem.
The bible says in 1 Tim. 5:8, "But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." Paul the Apostle of Grace wrote this. A husband's first priority in providing love is to his own wife and family, not to others.
Sean and Lisa
Do all Things Work Together for Good
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 2:02pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
The bible says all things work together for good for those who love God.
I think i heard Andrew say that if we do what is right then the Holy Spirit empowers us and thats why all things work together for good for those who love God.
Is this power which enables us the same as Grace?
(Nov. 8, 2012 – 5:48pm)
The bible says in Romans 8:26-28, "26 Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. 27 Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."
In verse 26, it is speaking of the Holy Spirit helping us in our weaknesses. Which in context is not knowing what we should pray. The Greek word for helps in verse 26 gives the idea of coming along side someone, not doing it for someone. In other words, if I ask someone to help me move the table to the other side of the room and I grab one side and the other person takes the other side and together we move the table, that is the picture that the Greek word for helps is painting. So this is speaking about praying in the Spirit. We are praying out of our spirit, which is joined to the Lord, which is the Holy Spirit praying though us the mysteries of God. (1 Cor. 14:2,14; 1 Cor. 6:17) When we yield our tongue to the Lord by praying in tongues, the Holy Spirit is praying the perfect will of God according to verse 27.
It is in this context that the promise of everything working together for good is given. However, this promise is not promised to everyone. It is only promised to those who love God and those who are call according to HIS purpose. We cannot be living for ourselves and fulfilling our own desires and then expect everything to work for good.
Do we love God? Are we allowing the Holy Spirit to pray through us? Have we aligned our lives with His purpose?
Yes, it is always grace that is the power that enables!
Sean and Lisa
(Nov. 12, 2012 – 3:09pm)
Dear Sean and Lisa,
Thanks a mil for once again helping!!!!!!Your answers all make alot of sense!!!!
Thankyou thankyou thankyou
PS:we praying about moving to Colorado one day to go to CBC